Apsie, Operations & ASD Brother

As you may know, Daniel is to have an operation to insert pins in his knees to correct a problem with the angle his joints are growing at following an appointment with osteopathy at the Children’s Hospital in Aberdeen. He’ll go in during the day, have the op then stay in over night for “pain management.” We’ve joked with him that it’ll be two days off school (which delights him!) then life will go on.

But since then, we’ve actually thought on what it will mean. First of all, its likely that Daniel will be off his feet for a lot longer than 2 days. Ordinarily, he’d be handed a pair of crutches and be left to hobble about. But given Daniel’s hyper mobility in his hands and elbows, which means his arms aren’t the strongest, will it be appropriate to give him crutches. So, early thought is, will he need a wheelchair. No doubt Daniel will love being wheeled about from here to there and back again, but it will bring a little set of problems that we’ll need to get around for a short time.

Then the next thought is, how will he get to school? Getting up there would be not to bad, but his class is up a flight of stairs, and in the short term after the op, there’s surely no way he’ll manage stairs. So, will he go into another class? Thing is all the P2 classes are upstairs. Even seeing the SEN teacher isn’t an option as she too is upstairs. Another little problem to think about!

But the stairs issue at school is one thing, but a friend did point out something we hadn’t even considered. How would Daniel get up the stairs at home? Well, umm, good question! Even were he to actually make it, his bed is a midi-sleeper, so he’d struggle to get up on to it if he had post-op knees. Fortunately we’ve got a sofa bed in the living room, so we’d at least have somewhere downstairs where he could sleep. That won’t just affect Daniel though. Old person practically lives there 8am – 10pm. The living room would have to be vacated by 8pm to let Daniel settle down for sleep. So that’s already one person that will be put out. There’s also the thought of leaving Daniel alone in a room with the TV, Wii, blu ray! If he wakes in the night at the moment, he comes through to us. In the night when he’s in the living room? That aside though, there’s a possible impact upon Matthew. Although the have their moments together, Matthew relies on having Daniel about throughout the day. I think he draws some comfort from having Daniel in the room at night. If Daniel were downstairs sleeping for a week or more, would Matthew cope being alone at night? I doubt it.

We’ve already considered that there’s not much point in signing up Daniel for Jazzercise and Saturday morning dancing – two activities that he absolutely loves. He was understanding when Jane talked about it after the consultation on Monday. That’s just now though – how will he feel when he’s missing Jazzercise in January? How will he cope with Matthew going off to dancing on a Saturday morning and he’s left behind? It will be difficult for him, and he will need a little bit more understanding when it comes round.

There’s certainly more to consider than we thought, but he’s coping reasonably well so far – but then the op is a couple of months away at least. I think he’ll enjoy talking about it with classmates – and showing off the scars! His best friend’s mum has said she has pics of his friend in hospital having a fine time, and that Daniel is welcome round to have a look in the hope it will put his mind at rest. But for now, its back to the waiting game.


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